So I read a story online that the
amalgamation of the Northern and Southern Nigeria will expire in 2014. The
excuse given was that the 1914 agreement was a test run and it was to last for just
a century.
Before I get arrested for treason, let me properly
explain what I read online (Dear SSS, Google can help you find the article
online if you need it, you don’t have to invite me.lol). The report says that
for the political entity ‘Nigeria’ to continue to exist, a new agreement has to
be reached, and I sincerely wish, hope and pray that this new agreement shall
be reached, that’s if the story is anything to go by.
But if it happens that an agreement cannot
be reached, it shall be a great opportunity for the ‘Biafra Republic’ to bring
to materialise the dreams of the Late Ojukwu, the Ogoni people too will also
want to make use of the opportunity to break out so as to gain full control of
their oil rich region, will the Yorubas pull out for the reason of continued safety,
also, will an ‘aBOKO’ region also be created, sorry I meant ‘Aboki’ region.
But can that agreement be reached? Like who
will not jump at an opportunity of a Terrorist free nation, yes the BokoHaram
is enough terror for anyone to think of, who will not want a kidnapping free
Country, who will not want a Peaceful nation without the Likes of some of these
money miss road politicians and Militants, especially the likes of Dokubo and
Tompolo who allegedly move about with several millions of various currencies in
their car trunks. Well I don’t blame those ones because Just like a shoeless
president, they lacked proper upbringing, they just accidentally ran into
money, so it is quite normal of them if they spend the money recklessly without
regarding those who actually worked hard for the money which is now illegally
in their possession. These are enough critical issues for any nation to be
worried about.
Why am I even ranting, I’ll just try and
console myself by picturing the looks on the faces of Yoruba leaders who’ll
tell the Edwin Clarks, The Buharis, the Obis, the IBBs and co a big ‘NO! Go
your ways and leave us in peace.’ Jonathan might not even be at that meeting, because
he might have been impeached by then and will have lost the only attribute that
can ever allow him into such a great meeting with those deserving men earlier
mentioned.
If a dead end should be reached at that
meeting, as predicted by the online report, the Yoruba states of the Southwest
region should be the first to pull out for the sake of peace alone. Though the
likes of Obasanjo will be scared because he has lost political relevance in the
South West, even in his own state, and Sadly he has nothing to be remembered of,
except being the President of an expired country. (May Nigeria never become that
expired country) Yoruba Republic (In American accent) won’t
be a bad name for the country, and Awolowo’s face might be on the National
flag.
First of all, we will have a Nobel Winner; yes
it is still Africa’s own Prof. Wole Soyinka. We might also be having the
richest man in Africa, as Dangote will be deported back to back to his Northern
Country and all his holdings impounded by the government. But he’ll still have
his PhD Drivers to drive him out of our country; so at least, he is guaranteed
a safe trip to his rightful country. We’ll also have a ready Seaport and
International airport and the highest number of universities.
We’ll just the money confiscated from our
deportees into tourism and become a ‘Dubai’. We’ll support our Economy with
Agriculture and thank God, I heard Oil has been discovered in Ondo State, so
we’ll be having oil too.
No more insults to our ‘h-factor’ and ’z- factor’,
my Ibadan compatriots will be the happiest about this. I’m sure they’ll even
vote that we scrap English Language, and adopt Yoruba Language as our lingua
Franca.
Kas’s ‘’omo Yoruba ni mi o’’ could be used as a national motto.
Wait, Donjazzy won’t be with us again, 2face,
Mi, Timaya, Genevieve, etc. But honestly, I am only really bothered about
Donjazzy , because we’ll still be having
Wandecoal, BankyW, Wizkid, TiwaSavage, OmoSexy, Funke Akindele and Co. But ID Cabasa and Ksolo will be the only
notable music Producers left for us. NO! Here, we’ll be having to negotiate for
a first time, we’ll be offering Ksolo, IdCabasa and twenty other producers in
exchange for Donjazzy. And if they reject, we might just add Dbanj and Kswitch
to the bargain. That’ll be a fair deal.
Another goodnews is that we’ll still be having
our two Grammy nominees.
Who else will be missed? Tonto what?? Did u
just say Tonto Dikeh?? Good riddance to bad rubbish!
So if I want to call my deported friends,
especially Diwa Ishaya and Nnamdi Ehirim, will I be able to afford the
international tariffs, as I am very sure MTN won’t be waiting for a minute
before they push up tariffs even across the Benin/Ore borders.
Another goodnews here, there’ll be no more
beggars on our streets as they’ll all be deported to their countries, the
population of prostitutes will also drastically reduce to the barest minimum,.
But who’ll now be the labourers at
construction sites, who will replace the popular Aboki Security men, who will
factories now employ for Hard Labour?
Who will be selling electronics at Alaba Intl. Market, who will be selling spare
parts at Ladipo Market. Will we still have access to Cows, as we all know these
cows understand just one language In this world, and that isn’t our language.
Also, no more ‘Adadis’, ‘Tm Lawal’, ‘Louis
Button’, ‘St LouisV’ ,’GUGGI’ and co, they’ll all be restricted to just one
country like that.
And there’ll also be no more fake biros
like the one I’m using right now…………………………….It just stopped writing……………….
THIS IS NOTHING BUT AN ATTEMPT TO BRING TO
OUR NOTICE THE FATE OF OUR NATION, AND THE INTENTION OF SOME ELEMENTS TO USE
THE 1914 AMALGAMATION TO CAUSE DISUNITY. NIGERIA DIVIDING WILL BE NO JOKE LIKE
WE JUST READ, IT WONT BE FUNNY AT ALL. FOR OUR INTEREST,LET US REMAIN AS ONE
AND MOVE NIGERIA FORWARD TO EVEN GREATER HEIGHTS. NIGERIA WILL STILL BE GREAT.
THE LABOURS OF OUR HEROES PAST SHALL NEVER BE IN VAIN! I BELIEVE
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